_Daughter like Esther.
This looks like a plate of bad food. Fried, unseasoned, unhealthy, unappetizing and cheap. It wasn't very good. But to me, this plate has significance.
This meal was the first meal at a restaurant that I have ever shared with my biological father.
Since Easter 2018, God has been moving mountains. These mountains had to be moved closer to me in order for me to start the climb up them. So while this journey of reconciliation comes with it's challenges. I know that God is at work.
Since my parents divorced when I was 5 I have been estranged with my Dad. I never really felt like I needed him. My Mom married my stepfather and he chose each and every day to love my brother and I. He is my Dad. Only recently have I needed to identify which "Dad" I am talking about in conversations. For the rest of this post and most that will be in this category, when I say Dad- I will be referring to my biological father.
You see, my Dad is complicated. I didn't invite him to my wedding. Didn't intend on my children ever to be around him. We were never close. I expected little and received even less growing up. My memories are vague and really none smell sweet to my soul. It was easier to avoid the issues and ignore him all together. Oh my friends- this is raw.
This will not be the last post about my Dad but it is the first. You see, he is a recovering alcoholic. The meal took place when he was 78 days into his sobriety. He has never been sober a day in his life until April 3, 2019. So this picture is much more than what it seems.
This meal is about a daughter and a father talking. This meal is about a relationship repairing. This meal is about emotions, fears, triumphs, and frustrations. This meal is about reconciliation. This meal is a step- a leap towards stitching broken hearts.
We don't always have to understand why God calls us to do things. We also don't have to wait until our feelings catch up. Love starts small. Love starts in actions. Love starts in picking up the phone to text. Love starts with a simple hello. Love starts with listening.
God is working on me. God is working on my Dad. This journey continues. 141 days into sobriety, I can't deny that there is a Creator who is cheering us both on.
More to come on this story... so much more friends.
But this is the beginning- not the end.